Love of the shallow end.

Don't know what it is... but in my 'thirty-something-ness ' I just can't handle the deep and meaningful. So for those of you who may wonder (according to my blog) if there is any depth to me.... i can assure you there is... it's just I've been swimming in it for most of my life - and now I'm getting tired.
I'm tired of looking for answers - tired of debating the possible answers. Tired of justifying myself. Tired of justifying others. Tired of trying to make the right impression. Tired of trying to make AN impression. Tired of trying to be diplomatic. Tired of trying to be right on. Tired of trying to be laid back. Tired of trying to be non-offensive. Tired of censoring. Tired of trying to be on the front line. Tired of feeling defensive. Tired. So I think I'm just gonna paddle about for a bit in these shallow waters. I like my provincial life actually. I like being middle class. I like being a mum. I like having a drama free life. I'm starting to find that there is peace in not feeling compelled to justify or validate my existence.
It is an ongoing battle to keep out of the deep end however. Today I kept swimming up there to have a dip... I'm easily led astray. But I'm absolutely knackered now as a result. So i'm gonna actually sit down now in the baby pool. Ahhhhh. Feels good.